It’s a question I’ve recently been asking myself. I don’t usually kill bugs when I find them in my house. I’ll take them outside, and give them a second chance to notice my “no trespassing” sign. “Next time”, I tell them, “I’m calling the cops.”
Scorpions, however, have no business in my home. And it’s not like I haven’t warned them. I let several go when I first moved in, and I sent them away with pamphlets entitled “So You’ve Decided to Disrespect Other People’s Property” to disburse among their nation.
Now I need to set examples.
Smashing them into my walls seemed to have worked for a while. Now I’ve become bored and annoyed with the inevitable clean up. My cats don’t go after them anymore either. They tell me their union contracts don’t cover scorpions: only moths and lizards.
So I’ve got a new plan.
I printed up a flyer for a scorpions only singles party at my house this Saturday night, And when they all show up, I’m locking them in my living room, turning on the television, and subjecting them to Pearl Harbor. That’s right. You want in? Suck on Pearl Harbor!!!
Yeah, I know. Stupidest blog ever. Shut up.
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