Wal-Mart, as many of you know, is the gateway to hell. At first I considered making this blog an indictment of the political wrongdoings of a corporation whose sole purpose is to assist in the destruction of our economy while simultaneously exploiting their employees. However, I realized that there's this concept called 'supply and demand'. Just as Hitler was able to rise through the overwhelming indifference of a nation, Wal-Mart was able to rise through the the missing chromosomes of its customers.
I don't shop at Wal-Mart but I like to spend time there. I like to spend time there when I feel really bad about myself like when I start fight with my girlfriend over something trivial or I accidentally run over a bunny.
After fifteen minutes and seeing missing teeth, missing hair, extra hair, extra fingers, hundreds of pounds shoved into spandex, drawn-on eyebrows, children on leashes, food court hookers, vomiting alcoholics, coinstar tweekers, women who could be men, pregnant fourteen year-olds, grandmothered thirty year-olds, people who support the troops in Iraq who can't find Iraq on a map, people who can't find Arizona on a map, people who think a map is what you use to clean floors with, Vietnam vets who insist on testing the paint ball guns before purchasing, and people who wait in line for three days to buy new video game systems I like John D. Rockefeller.
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